Romantically Disallusioned

Romantically Disallusioned



I'm romantically retarded.
I never attract the guys I like.
Or that type. Only attracting
People and thugs I detest.
Another notch, another rejection.
But another rejection shouldn't be A big deal.
Though I'm used to it I still can't help but to cry.
And now in my bed I lye,
Wishing was my beloved Vegas skyline.
It got me through so many hard times.
I wish I was on morphine.
My scar to Be cleaned with iodine.
One day I'll be fine.
My wounds just take their time.
Wounds take your time.
The Tylenol hasn't kicked in.
Sleepy but not to the point of death.
Which is such a shame.
I would no longer feel lame.
Singing all the love songs I know.
Rewatching all my rejections as if a show.
Family, friends, and men.
I've never been acceptable to them.
I'm dreaming of never waking up again.
All of my suicidal tendencies are coming back.
God will you ever cut me some slack?
I am romantically delusional.
Those dreams will never come true.
Trying to push my pencil into my heart.
But the arrow that pierced my heart is still there.
I've only ever been shot there once.
Looking at the bright side now:
people will Look at this poem and say wow.
Songs will be formed because of this.
One day, hopefully I will learn from this.
Always alone with no one to hold.
Or to hold me.
Tired of laying my tattered heart on the line.
After writing this line I still have the need to cry.
Love will never be a luxury given to me.
I wonder;
how many times will be broken?
I guess we'll see.